Separation and divorce has been an unfortunate fact of life for many families in recent years.  Although the rise in the divorce rate may be slowing down, all of us know at least one couple going through the process even if we are fortunate enough not to be experiencing it ourselves.

Very often the first port of call when separation is imminent or has just happened is the solicitors office.  It is a time of great emotional difficulty for those involved and sometimes the initial advice given by the solicitor at the first interview may all be a bit of a blur when you think about it afterwards.

For the solicitor, however, the first interview is very important because, whilst lending a sympathetic ear, it helps us to pave the way for what needs to happen in the future.

A significant part of the discussion surrounds the collection of basic information about the history of the marriage, any children and the couples’ financial situation.  People often have different priorities and these also need to be identified at an early stage.

For some, the most important thing they want to hear about is the procedure for divorce.  For others it is the welfare of children or how to deal with immediate financial issues such as how bills are going to be paid that come to the fore.

Where children are concerned, both husband and wife must understand that they share parental responsibility.  There is no hard and fast rule over who the children should live or how often they see the other parent, but it is vital that both recognise the childrens’ welfare is what a court will be most concerned about if a case should find its way before a Judge. 

In most cases parents manage to avoid serious disputes over the children but your solicitor should discuss with you what arrangements are to be made for them.

Frequently, financial matters may only be dealt with in general terms at the first meeting stage – it is very unusual for someone coming for initial advice to have all the necessary financial information with them.  However, not everyone’s finances are complicated and, in straightforward cases, an experienced solicitor should be able to give a reasonable idea of how a court would approach matters.

Even if you do not receive a detailed prediction of how the case will end on your first visit to your solicitor, you should at least have some idea as to how a court would consider the division of assets.

Of course, many people are concerned about legal costs. Your solicitor should be able to give you an estimate of how much you will have to pay and whether you are eligible for legal aid. He or she will also discuss with you the pros and cons of mediation as a way of resolving a dispute with your partner.  For many people mediation is worth exploring but it is not the solution to every matrimonial problem.

Most initial interviews last about an hour and it is not surprising that people often leave feeling a little shell-shocked.  A letter from your solicitor following the meeting and summarising the advice given is always helpful to clarify issues and help you fully understand the information you have been given.

For more information about the issues raised in this article, or any other family law matter, please contact Alyson Howland on 0115 8511666